Things I would tell my younger self: Irene Ang, actress and Fly Entertainment founder

Irene Ang believes there are four types of friends. One of them, the Singaporean multi-hyphenate shared, “just sucks the hell out of you”.

The actress, who is also a host, comedian and founder of artiste management agency Fly Entertainment, described friendship using a tree analogy. While some friends come and go like leaves, others “need to (be) tested” like branches. 

The most dependable ones, however, are akin to roots. And for Irene, who is turning 55 in September, they are her family and the friends she grew up with.

Irene plays housewife Yao Hui Qing in the recent Mediacorp series To Be Loved. The 20-episode drama, which concluded on May 24 and is still available on mewatch, features characters navigating grief, mental health and other life challenges.

“That character (I played) is very much like me because she has very few friends. Her life revolves around her husband, her son and her best friend. That's all. 

“I haven't reached that stage but I can identify (with her) in that area,” she told CNA Lifestyle.

Irene has always been open about her past. Besides revealing that she came from a “broken family with a gangster father and a drug abuser mother”, she has also been candid about her former lifestyle as a party animal. 

She shared that while she made many friends during her “Zouk days”, those friendships did not last.

“As you grow older, you will start losing friends because you find that your values and your goals don't align. You’ll become more and more protective of the time that you have, and you just want to focus on those that matter,” she said.

Now, Irene’s social circle includes friends from her childhood, as well as those she made while working, including clients, journalists and those working in public relations. 

And it seems like blending her work and personal life has its perks. After all, she often faces the brunt of being in the public eye. 

“Whatever you see, hear or read about yourself on social media becomes not as disturbing because you have a support group who understands the media,” she explained, adding that they know how to comfort her whenever she faces any backlash.

"On the reverse, if you do something wrong, they will be the ones also to text you, 'Eh you cannot say like that now, you will get cancelled' ... then you (can) quickly go and edit your posts," she quipped.

Now, whenever she “feels like shit”, she would actively seek validation from her inner circle, or “the usual suspects” as dubbed by her personal assistant.

“I feel like I need to speak up (but) I realised that not everybody is as bold as me. So then I try to be the voice for people. I try to be the voice for caregivers. I try to be the voice for drug abusers (and) kids.”

This is one of the reasons Irene decided to accept the role in To Be Loved. 

In the series, her son, played by Ayden Sng, is a specialist doctor who is "handsome and admired by many". While he is successful in both his career and personal life (he has a “beautiful girlfriend” played by Sheryl Ang), he suffers from depression.

This, Irene revealed, spoke to her as it is a cause and message she believes in. The challenge that came with playing a mother who was oblivious about her son’s struggles in a fully Mandarin show was a bonus. 

“Mental health is something that is very real in today's context. It can happen to anyone near you,” she said, adding that she has experienced depression, anxiety and had suicidal thoughts herself.

“I don't want to waste those experiences that I've gone through … I don't want to waste those pain and hurt, and try to bury them because my speaking up can always (help someone else).”

On May 17, Irene took to Instagram to share some of her experiences with her mother, who was a drug abuser, for the annual Drug Victims Remembrance Day.

After she posted the video, both celebrities and non-celebrities sent her messages to thank her for sharing her story, she said.

“I always know that when I (speak out), there will be at least one person that will be impacted … That's why I do what I do.”

And with social media, being vocal has become easier.

Despite already wearing many hats, Irene said she’s trying to add one more to the mix – an influencer. 

Irene, who was a “tech idiot” before the COVID-19 pandemic, said that she used to snub social media.

“After Facebook, all these TikTok, Instagram nonsense (popped up), you know. But how am I supposed to know they're here to stay, right? How am I supposed to know that now, it has created a bunch of new types of talent and artists?”

The industry veteran believes that the role of an artiste has evolved over the years. Back then, actors only had to act, hosts only had to host and singers only had to sing. Now, they also have to film a slew of social media content to engage their fans.

Besides posting behind-the-scenes videos, they even have to worry about product placement as some have become ambassadors for certain brands. 

“Today is so different, you really, really have to embrace change. That's why I'm so thankful that my company's policy is, ‘We are the change we want to see.’”

Yet, the past cannot be changed. Irene said she had spent too much time dwelling on her past failures over the years, and knows that lost time can never be brought back.

“If I have to give myself (one piece of) advice … it would be that everything is possible if you put your heart and soul into it and that you learn along the way, so don't give up so easily. 

“I think resilience comes from learning from failures and as long as you don't quit there's always a turning point to success.”

To Be Loved is available on mewatch.