Commentary: Many women are familiar with the fear on Ariana Grande's face when that man rushed at her

Unlike American singer and actress Ariana Grande, I'm not a well-loved celebrity with legions of fans, some borderline obsessive. There is close to zero probability that I’d ever get mobbed in public. 

But as I watched one viral clip after another of the Wicked: For Good star frozen in shock after Johnson Wen – a serial event crasher who’s pulled similar pranks on other celebrities – rushed up to her at the movie’s Singapore premiere on Thursday (Nov 13), I felt a rush of empathy I wish I didn’t recognise.

In the couple of seconds that the flash of panic lasted on Grande’s face before her co-stars Cynthia Erivo and Michelle Yeoh swooped in to protect her, I saw her fear writ large.

I wanted to reach through the screen to tell a pop star I barely relate to: I know that feeling too.

The commotion, which has since made headlines internationally, momentarily disrupted the yellow carpet walk at Universal Studios Singapore on Thursday evening.

Widely circulated clips show Wen leaping over a barricade to bypass security. He barrels past a few photographers in a mad dash toward Grande before forcefully slinging an arm around her and jumping up and down in triumph. 

Grande, who was calmly interacting with fans just moments earlier, is visibly jolted by the sudden contact. 

Erivo instantly lunges across Yeoh, who’s standing beside her, to break Wen’s hold. She shoves him away and fixes him with a glare, while Yeoh pulls Grande into her embrace. 

Security guards pull Wen away from the women and pin him to the ground before escorting him out.

On Friday, Wen was charged in court with being a public nuisance. The charge carries a jail term of up to three months or a maximum fine of S$2,000, or both.

"IMAGINE HOW TERRIFYING THAT IS"

Of all the reactions that followed the incident, one TikTok user best described how it appeared Grande felt.

"Imagine how terrifying that is: For a man you don't know to come running full force at you and you don't know what their intentions are," they wrote.

Wen, an Australian content creator who calls himself a “troll most hated”, has a history of similar stunts. He's invaded concerts by Katy Perry and The Weeknd, filming his glee after shocking them with his sudden appearances on stage.

So he is no stranger to rage-baiting exploits. But his unpredictable behaviour evokes a particular kind of fear many women become acquainted with at some point in life – never by choice and always without warning. 

It’s a fear that lives deep in the body, waiting to surface when a safety we've never questioned suddenly feels uncertain. 

There is no telling what the first trigger will be. Maybe your boyfriend grips your hand a little too tightly during a fight. Maybe the male taxi driver sounds a little too curious about where you’re headed. Maybe a man on an empty train stands just a little too close. 

What you do know is that something shifts in that instant. You see your vulnerability too clearly, and your sense of safety fractures into what once was and what now is.

The average woman may never face Wen's erratic antics or endure Grande’s extreme experience, but the underlying fear that a man could physically overpower and hurt us is universal. 

It brings to mind that familiar saying: “Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.”

After clips of the incident went viral, many asked how this could happen in Singapore – a country renowned for its safety. If you’re equally confused, count yourself lucky.

Because for many women, the answer is obvious: It happened because anything can happen, at any time.

Still, if there were a silver lining to the entire ruckus, it was Erivo and Yeoh’s instinctive display of support for Grande. 

After Wen was wrestled away by security, the two older actresses closed ranks around her, checking if she was okay as she regained composure – Yeoh holding her by the arms, Erivo steadying her from behind.

One can only imagine that perhaps they too understood that universal fear many women feel. If anything, being a celebrity might put them closer to it, with the added weight of stalkers and constant exposure.

If Grande and her female co-stars had called it a night to recover from the mayhem, no one would’ve blamed them. But they continued their walk down the yellow carpet – all smiles and hand in hand.

Grande herself displayed no trace of the shock from mere moments earlier and appeared cheerful even, judging by clips from the rest of the premiere.

Of course, any woman who’s ever had a similar scare knows it's never that easy to move on. We might stop visiting a place after being followed by a stranger, or take a different route to work to avoid the colleague who gave us the creeps.

And yet, like Grande, many of us find a way to pull ourselves together and carry on, even if it's just on the surface for a start.

Not because our fear isn’t valid, and certainly not because we've overcome it. We simply come to accept that our fear is so ordinary, so expected and so routine that we may always live with it – but we can still refuse to live in it.